Child arrangements after separation: a guide for parents

When parents separate, the most important decisions are usually about the children: where they will live, how much time they will spend with each parent, and how important decisions will be made. Most families reach agreement without a court order, and the law encourages this.

Agreeing arrangements

A written parenting plan can set out living arrangements, holidays, schooling, communication and how you will handle changes. It is not legally binding, but it gives everyone clarity. Many parents use family mediation, where a trained mediator helps you reach agreement. Mediation is confidential and usually much quicker and cheaper than court. Legal aid can cover mediation if you are eligible.

Parental responsibility

Parental responsibility means the legal rights and responsibilities a parent has for a child, such as consenting to medical treatment and choosing a school. Mothers automatically have it. Fathers have it if they were married to the mother when the child was born or later, or if they are named on the birth certificate for births registered in England and Wales after 1 December 2003. Others can acquire it by agreement or court order.

Going to court

If you can't agree, either parent can apply to the family court. Before applying, you must normally attend a Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting (MIAM), unless an exemption applies, for example where there is evidence of domestic abuse or urgency.

The court can make:

• a child arrangements order, deciding who a child lives with and spends time with;
• a specific issue order, deciding a particular question such as schooling or medical treatment;
• a prohibited steps order, preventing a parent from taking a particular step, such as moving abroad with the child.

What the court considers

The child's welfare is the court's paramount consideration. Under the Children Act 1989, the court considers a "welfare checklist", including the child's wishes and feelings (in light of their age and understanding), their physical, emotional and educational needs, the likely effect of any change, any harm they have suffered or are at risk of, and how capable each parent is of meeting their needs. The court also presumes, unless the contrary is shown, that the involvement of both parents furthers the child's welfare, provided it is safe.

The role of Cafcass

In England, the Children and Family Court Advisory and Support Service (Cafcass) carries out safeguarding checks at the start of a case, and may later prepare a report for the court. In Wales, the equivalent body is Cafcass Cymru. They focus on the child's interests, not either parent's.

When to get legal advice

Advice from a child law solicitor is especially important if there are safeguarding concerns, allegations of abuse, a plan to relocate (particularly abroad), or if children's services are involved. Parents in care proceedings brought by a local authority are entitled to legal aid without a means test.